5 Things That Can Screw Up Your Magical First Kiss

By on July 9, 2015

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So you have been dating the cutest girl you have met for the past week. Because she could possibly be “The One”, you are so afraid of screwing it up by making a bold move to kiss her right from the first date. You are after all trying to project the image that you are cool and in no rush to get physical. You attempt to behave like the chivalrous male lead in that blockbuster Hollywood romantic comedy. Surely the time will come naturally when your lips meet for the first time and magic happens like flipping on the switch for the Christmas lights.

It might surprise you. But that girl you are dating could be waiting impatiently for you to make that move as well. As you might suspect, she won’t initiate it to avoid being stereo-typed as the type of women who is too open-minded. Even if that is far from the truth.

It can sound weird. But what other people think about her can be something more powerful than you ever thought. This social pressure can dictate her behavior even though you two are alone with no one around.

If she is already attracted to you as a man, any mistakes you make on that first kiss can be easily laughed off and normal service can resume. It is only when she is still threading the line of whether she wants you or not where a disastrous first kiss can send you packing and you will never see her on a date again.

5 First Kiss Mistakes You Want To Avoid

Getting the timing wrong

In a concert or a filming scene, the artistes involved have to get their cues and timing right. Failing which the director could irritatingly get everyone to redo it again. You do not have to go to such extreme and get it right to the millisecond. But you surely cannot go for it at the wrong place and the wrong time. If you are already in a relationship, this could be simple fun. But when dating, doing this for the first kiss can quickly send you into the category of a desperate man or a horny teenager.

Don’t think that you have the swift reflexes of Spiderman and can get it done without her noticing. As you try to go for it, start noticing if she is subtly giving your permission to go ahead with your mission.

Women are very well-tuned to non-verbal cues. They can tell most of the time what you are actually doing and what you are going to do. So they know when you are making a move to kiss her. At this point, she will likely do things that will signal you to stop.

Watch out for her turning her back against you, changing body posture to make your move all the more difficult, start looking at her phone for some mysterious message that never came, etc.

Keeping your eye open

This can be the creepiest thing that any woman can experience. You probably just want to savor the moment and see how beautiful she looks while kissing you for the first time. That is fine as long as she does not notice your bulging eyes staring at her like a hawk. But if she just opens her eyes slightly to have a look, you are screwed big time. You will be the subject of weirdo gossip later that night when she calls her BFF in bed for the daily roundup.

Remember those psychotic gore movies where crazy serial killers go on a rampage in their basements? No you are not one of them. But that image comes to mind. Even if you think that you have more or less closed the deal, a mistake like that at this point in a relationship can set about a motion of events that will wipe off your hopes with her.

Letting you equipment loose

You must have been waiting for this moment for some time. So much so that your tongue is already out flapping around like a puppy even before your lips meet. Watch for the clothes as your saliva starts dripping all over the place. This can be really disturbing. Considering that we are human being taught to cherish hygiene, and here is a boy with a hidden doggy instinct.

Licking can be a very sexy sensual act. Behaving like a dog too. But this is the first kiss are talking about here. Getting her face soaked is not exactly what she had in mind when she agreed to go watch a movie with you. Punishing you in bed for such behavior is hardly even on her mind. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot and be conscious of what you are doing.

You can have all the fun after you have her as your girlfriend. But before that, leave your disturbing instincts at home.

Lack of mobility

If all the information you could have learned from came from a children’s book, you will be excused for thinking that all you have to do is keep sucking. Remember that women like powerful vacuum cleaners for a whole other reason. And that reason has nothing to do with kissing. If you do not have the natural instinct to maneuver, you definitely should try to move, rotate, let go. Have some variety.

An awkward moment like getting her mouth stuck to the head of a vacuum cleaner is sure to make it’s way into the phone conversation she has with her BFF each night. They will be laughing over it and you might not get another chance since she has now given herself the self-image of someone thinking that you are a loser.

Too much tongue

You are not digging for diamonds or gold in a mine field. So don’t act like you are. If you are not careful, you might even get yourself stuck in her braces. Leave the search for cavity to the dentist. The rouge shred of beef between her teeth from the dinner steak earlier is not meant for you. Don’t jab, thrust, poke, attack, destroy, etc. screw up the first kiss and you may never get another one again.

Too much tongue turns kissing from a sensual act to one that resembles being water-boarded. And that can be an experience she will tell her kids about years from now. And those kids have no relation to you whatsoever because of your one moment of eagerness.


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